2024

Every year, I set out to write a reflection on how the year has unfolded. This year is no different. However, I'm finding myself struggling to find the right approach to deliver it. 

So, I turned to Gemini (oh yes I am in for AI help) for some blog post prompts, and here's what I came up with. Let's dive in!

What were your biggest accomplishments this year?

...to finally pursue my long-time dream? I've mentioned in previous blog posts how much I’ve always wanted to continue my education. At first, I had no idea where to begin or how to take the first step. But by God's grace, I’ve learned the process and received help from so many supportive people. 

Read: Study Abroad Mentorship

You see, my greatest accomplishment isn't winning an award or a competition. It’s about overcoming the feeling of being stuck in the moment. I allowed myself to take that first step and walked the path, courageously believing that now is the time. Honestly speaking, I’m still afraid. But someone once said that if you feel fear when pursuing your dreams, it means you're on the right track. I hope that’s true.

What were your biggest challenges?

Did I face any challenges? Well, let me tell you—one of the most memorable ones was getting scammed by an Indonesian promoter. And as the year draws to a close, I still haven't received the refund I’m owed. It's incredibly disappointing, especially considering how hard I worked to earn that money. Honestly, I can’t help but feel a sense of anger and frustration towards them. I hope they rot in deepest layer of hell.

Read: My Heartbreak Moment

What lessons did you learn?

I’ve learned so much this year. First and foremost, I became more aware of the ongoing genocide in Palestine. I realized that I’ve lived a life of privilege, one that I’ve often taken for granted. I have a roof over my head and the security of a monthly paycheck. What I have is what many in Palestine can only dream of. It’s heartbreaking to witness such oppression, and sometimes, I feel this overwhelming urge to go there and help in any way I can. But the question is, what can I do? 

Instead, I’ve focused on learning how to be resilient, how to cultivate gratitude, and how to use my voice effectively. I’ve committed myself to supporting Palestine in any way I can. I’ve also come to understand just how valuable time and opportunity are. I have a responsibility to do my job well, not just as an office worker, but as a human being, as a Muslim, and as someone who will be held accountable on the Day of Judgment for the choices I’ve made. This has made me more mindful of how I think, speak, act, and interact with others.

The second lesson I’ve learned is about acceptance, or legowo in Javanese. I’ve learned not to question what God has given me. I’m trying to believe that nothing in this world truly belongs to me, and that God can take away what I think is mine at any moment. This realization has brought me a sense of peace, as I now understand that the life I am living is the best scenario for me.

What are you most proud of?

I’m truly proud of staying sane and alive—honestly. In this dystopian world, maintaining my sanity is something I deeply cherish. I’m also proud of not supporting or voting for the wrong side, choosing instead to stand apart from the forces of evil (you know I'm talking about presidential election huh).

This year, I also experienced many "firsts." 

My first time attending a concert alone. 

My first time hanging out with Melody. 

My first time visiting Sulawesi Island. 

My first time exploring Sumatra Island. 

Life truly becomes beautiful and exhilarating when you embrace those first-time experiences, don’t you think? I’ll always be my own biggest supporter, constantly giving myself credit for the good things I’ve done!

So, what is your goal for next year?

Can staying alive be considered a goal? If not, then if God grants me another day to breathe, I hope to take that opportunity to start living in my dream country and return to being a college student.

I’m also excited to start taking a Korean language class next year! Yay to another learning adventure! I’ve realized that I really love discovering new things. I even plan to take the proficiency test as well!

Last but not least, I wrapped up the year by watching an online concert held by Melody! Finally! Even though the journey took nearly three hours of commuting, I made it. We might not be the loudest or most notorious fandom, but we are as solid as ever. It was a beautiful experience and has already become a core memory of this year. 

I made new acquaintances, received some freebies, and most importantly, found happiness. Truly, happiness is something we need to create for ourselves, not just search for. Anyway, happy New Year! Wishing you all good health and prosperity!